Children’s book Those Darn Squirrels may have helped end the War in Iraq Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The CDC has decided that butane particulates inside of creme brûlée makes it unsafe to eat multiple times per day Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
Mark Zuckerberg’s great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather was the first person to avoid being painted with an erection by wearing a codpiece Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The earliest known photographic evidence showing a white guy thinking of the n-word sells for a whopping $58294929047 Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
A new type of sloth has been discovered hanging on a sewage pipe Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The legitimacy of a certificate of authenticity is greatly reduced if the frame is too cute Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
Man who got pet tortoise stuck in chimney is going to prison until a day after the shelled reptile passes away Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The likelihood of accidentally stepping on a creature increases while wearing shoes Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
To compete with McDonald’s Monopoly promotion, Burger King has placed a tracking device inside of 6 fake onion rings and if you’re lucky enough to choke on one, you will be glad you almost died Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
A new study has found that 7% of silica gel packets contain Parmesan cheese Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
Carpet manufacturers are now including bottles of dye to bleach and re-dye your carpet, instead of using a carpet cleaner, which is expected to bankrupt Bissell by 2023 Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The Hydrogenated Tallow Acid in Irish Spring’s original soap is derived from cows that have a direct ancestral link to ones owned by the guy who bullied Hitler and made fun of his paintings Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
New dog breed features hairy, curly penis above its butt which will make doggie style a weird thing moving forward Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
A top exporter of goji berries has been selling dehydrated rat testicles soaked in cherry juice and nobody could tell the difference until a super taster tried a few Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
GoFundMe launched for man whose ladder was stolen Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
YouTube video titled Best Memes 2019 spliced in Nazi propaganda, but nobody noticed until it was too late Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
Life hack: Crying during a Zoom meeting may be frowned upon, but running away once noticed can buy you several hours of free time. Just think of a good reason why you cried before you return Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
How do leprechauns stay happy despite being so short and ugly? 99 bitches from a recent survey on Family Feud said it’s from the magical beer those drunk bastards are always full of Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
The road that many thought led nowhere actually leads to a big old mound of Pogs Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE
Elton John’s first piano sells for $68,284 at auction Your browser does not support the audio element. LISTEN LIVE