Carpet manufacturers are now including bottles of dye to bleach and re-dye your carpet, instead of using a carpet cleaner, which is expected to bankrupt Bissell by 2023
The new MINI Cooper will feature a drainable floor mat allowing you to urinate in traffic
Rust-oleum wins bid to repaint The White House, but now Trump gets to decide on it being chiffon cream or alabaster
The Hydrogenated Tallow Acid in Irish Spring’s original soap is derived from cows that have a direct ancestral link to ones owned by the guy who bullied Hitler and made fun of his paintings
Why would a chickenhawk be photographed leaving Chris Cristie’s New Jersey mansion at 2:49am? Is he cheating on Mary Pat?!?
Broward County Police Department to phase out white officers by 2023
An early Fantastic Four comic has predicted nothing yet but we’re looking
New dog breed features hairy, curly penis above its butt which will make doggie style a weird thing moving forward
Firestone unveiled new thinner but thicker tire at Zoom Zoom Zoom 2020
Alcohol prep pad company goes out of business after not being able to afford a new perforation blade
Bye-bye Hydroxychloroquine, hello barium in the butt? Trump tweeted then deleted his support of the procedure saying that he and Melania have “several inches of barium in our butts right this very moment”
UH OH. Trump forgot his iPhone charger before going into quarantine
A top exporter of goji berries has been selling dehydrated rat testicles soaked in cherry juice and nobody could tell the difference until a super taster tried a few
Glass jam jars account for most of the pollution at the bottom of the Mariana Trench
Trump’s campaign offers a partial refund for anyone who bought leggings and wanted Trump to be facing the other way
Wolfgang Puck’s $54 grilled cheese contains no cheese, is baked, and uses thin lines of gravy to mimic the Maillard reaction
Cleaning up our oceans by throwing plastic into volcanoes ended up being a bad idea
Horseshoes used in professional races must now contain at least 0.3% dead horse bone to remind us all that yesterday is still with us today
